"Are there 'Free Hugs' in Korea?"

For months, I've been saying the thing I miss most as a foreigner in Korea are hugs. In Korean culture, they just aren't that common, even among friends. As a Pacific Northwestern-er in my fantastically lovable college town, Bellingham, people with 'Free Hugs' signs were incredibly commonplace (so commonplace, in fact, that a lot of people began to ignore them). Well, since being in Korea, I can honestly say I've been in a constant state of hug withdrawals.

But last night, we saw something pretty incredible.

Two high school girls stood in the main strip of Song-nam Dong (Old Downtown) with 'Free Hugs' signs. At first, my gut reaction was to keep walking... until I realized we were in KOREA and these girls are AMAZING and I really need more hugs in my life.

It was hands-down the best hug I've had in weeks.

If anyone is wondering why I decided to post about this, it's because I want you to know that not every culture is going to express love the way you expect. And sometimes those little personal interactions really matter; when they aren't there they are missed, more than anything else.

I also encourage you to hug the next person you see who's gutsy enough to hold up a sign that says 'Free Hugs'. You're not too cool for it; everyone needs a little more love in their life.

Because I was too dumbfounded and found the moment too special and fleeting, there is no photo for today's blog. Instead, I thought I'd share this video, sent to me by someone awesome in the NW when I explained, months ago, just how much I was missing those hugs. He said I should look for someone like this:



 안아 (that's hugs) from South Korea,
Laura

Lessons Learned from the Life of a Guest English Teacher.

A few people have asked to read the essay I wrote for a competition this year through EPIK. Here it is, in all its 2nd place glory (yes, yes; there's my charming sarcasm again).

On a more serious note, I am so thankful that my essay was chosen, and thrilled to see that I have so many people supporting my efforts abroad, including my school, who helped me to give my plain paper essay some finishing touches in the most Korean way possible (aka: completely without my consent but utterly appreciated!). 

Thanks for your kind words, positive vibes, and endless encouragement.

And for anyone who reads this in its entirety... you're rad.

Lessons Learned from the Life of a Guest English Teacher

I don’t think I can express just how different every foreigner’s experience is when they move to a new place. In fact, the one thing every foreigner likely does have in common when they think about their life in Korea is that it’s nothing like they imagined it would be. Talk about room for personal and professional growth! Here are some of my own stories from this transition to Korea so far, and the lessons I’ve gleaned from them:

Expect adventures in Korean dining.

I’ve had some interesting experiences just trying to eat in Korea. I love Korean food, but had to give up some of my own stubborn eating habits in order to truly enjoy it. When I first arrived in Korea, I was a vegetarian and wanted to maintain that dietary standard. However, after a few strange encounters with restaurant food, I decided a little meat in my diet wouldn’t be the worst thing after all. This first comedic incident occurred before I even left EPIK Orientation, and it‘s one I‘ll never forget:

Sitting with my friends in a Korean barbeque with virtually no knowledge of the Korean language, no readable menu, and my dietary needs... we defaulted to the other foreigners we saw in the restaurant, and enlisted their help. This resulted in one of the most awkward experiences I've had to date. Soon our fellow foreigners and the Korean servers were in what appeared to be a discussion over why someone would willingly come to a barbeque when they don't eat meat. If that wasn't enough, they all began pointing at me from across the restaurant so we could clear up this debacle. It was hard not to sink in my chair from this point on, especially when they came over and laughed when I verified that I really couldn‘t eat anything on the menu.

The lesson I would like to pass on from this night is that one should always come prepared to dine in a foreign country. The Korean culture is very hospitable and the women working that night definitely didn’t let me go hungry, but I certainly could have been more helpful if I was aware of some options to ask for in advance. Of course, there is always the possibility that the etiquette of a new culture will provide enough of a challenge. Here are some feelings from my first experience dining out with my school:

It’s my first staff meal and I feel completely lost. In the United States, I would be contributing to the conversation and making jokes. In Korea, I’m not even sure when I’m supposed to pour the water, which way to put my chopsticks, or even how to eat many of these dishes! These factors, in combination with the language barrier, make me about as comfortable as sitting on the floor does. Both I’m going to have to get used to. For the first time, I felt so socially out of place I thought I might begin to spill tears in the middle of lunch; not the impression I want to make on my new Principal and staff! Fortunately, one of my co-teachers told me not to worry. “We’re all very nice, don’t be nervous” she said. Those few words were enough for me to keep trying to cut fish with my chopsticks.

Although I still can’t cut fish properly with my chopsticks, I have learned how to act socially-presentable on a variety of other levels since moving to Korea. A few days after this lunch, I had a private meal with my co-teacher and took the time to ask her about proper eating manners in Korea. At first, I was a little embarrassed to ask her which way I should place my chopsticks between bites, but she seemed more than happy to help me adjust to Korean culture. Now that I see how eating together is an important part of social and professional life, I sometimes wish I had received a lesson on manners in Korean dining from the EPIK Orientation. It certainly would have helped to boost my confidence when taking those first few meals together as a school!

Learn some of the history.

Upon arriving at EPIK Orientation, it was made abundantly clear that learning some history of Korea would be necessary to our understanding of the culture. I gave each lecture my full attention but didn’t understand the magnitude of their importance until one night, heading home:

I’m in a taxi and the driver begins to speak to me in English. He seems very friendly and comments on how much he loves American baseball. We speak in broken English and Korean for a few minutes when he begins to share his extremely negative views toward Japan with me. I sit and listen, remembering the history lesson on Japan and South Korea I received at EPIK orientation.

Understanding history helps us to see the way culture is shaped. The two concepts are intertwined. One teacher at my school is very dedicated to my learning of Korean history and culture, and is kind enough to take me and other foreign teachers I know around our area to show us more about the country we live in now. The more I see and learn about Korea’s past, the more I can understand and find meaning in the present culture I live in. It is useful if I want to work professionally with other teachers, relate to my students, or hear a taxi driver’s story with an enlightened perspective.

Trust the system.

Sometimes, we are truly tested in another culture. One of the most obvious times in our lives when we depend on a system to work is when we are ill. Here’s a short account of the first time I was sick in Korea:

This past week, I've been feeling a bit low on energy and recently have begun to experience dizziness when I wake up. What made this situation even more interesting was that this was my first encounter with Korean medical practices. The nurse gave me some pills, all labeled in Hangul, and sent me off. No better time to start really trusting another culture than when you have to get medical attention!

I was really nervous to go to the doctor in Korea. In American culture, people generally have a bad habit of waiting until the illness becomes serious to go to a doctor. It wasn’t until one of my foreigner friends gave me some words of encouragement that I decided to put my health in the hands of the Korean medical system. “You need to trust the doctors here,” she said. Sure enough, all I had to do was let the medical system do its job (and let my co-teachers help me to and from the doctor), and I was healthy in no time! As with many cultural differences, sometimes it’s difficult to let go and try something a different way. However, it’s usually better to let go and let it happen. In this particular case, I couldn’t have put my health in better hands.

Honor your native culture.

I came to Korea with the humble perspective that this opportunity was going to be solely about Korean culture, but I was only half-correct. Although it’s true that on a daily basis, foreigners adapt to a new set of customs and habits, it doesn’t mean that their own culture isn’t of interest to Koreans! I learned this very quickly after starting my job. Being a foreigner in an elementary school sometimes feels akin to being a celebrity: everyone wants to know about your life! If I had thought about my teaching job with this perspective before moving to Korea, I would have brought more artifacts from America for the students to look at, which I now know to be a useful learning tool in the classroom. It would’ve been nice to see something like this on a packing list from EPIK, encouraging us to be just as ready to accept this new, Korean culture as we should be to share whatever we can from our native, English-speaking one. 

 

Remember with culture, it’s not better or worse. It’s just different.

As a foreigner, understand that there will be times when you feel ridiculous or out of place. The best way to counter this is with humility, not embarrassment. Culture is a far bigger and more powerful force than our own prides, so take every stumble as a learning opportunity and move along. Occasionally, you will feel completely lost. You may hear your name in conversation but not know what the conversation is about, and you may not know how to eat half the food you are served on any given day. To deal with these factors gracefully take on a sense of trust and adventure in the people you surround yourself with. If you can look at the big picture, it’s easier to trust this new system. Keep in mind that this won’t happen overnight. For a long period of time, you may not know things you once considered basic, such as where, or even if you can buy shoes in your size. There are things for every foreigner that makes them feel a little more at home. Recognize what those things are to you and figure out how to fulfill those needs. Even if it’s internet shopping.

As with any life experience, the outcome and lessons you gain from them is a choice. With new cultural experiences, this is no different. Every experience, good or otherwise, has the potential to enrich your life. All it takes is humility to realize that you’ll never know it all, but the courage to learn from whomever or whatever comes your way.

If you are considering teaching English in South Korea, make sure to check out EPIK's site: www.epik.go.kr . You will also find the winning entries from this year (including my essay) on EPIK's site soon!

A haiku in honor of my afternoon snack, ii.

Are you milk or not?

Bubbly, fizzy Milkis drink.

Something tells me 'no'.

Thank you to my brother for bringing this Korean beverage to my attention, and my language study group for telling me I can find them at virtually every convenience store.

Oh, and keeping to the theme of the banana milk obsession here, Milkis also comes in banana flavor.

A haiku in honor of my afternoon snack, i.

Little ginseng bite.

Sweet and healthy; I'm confused.

You're a... vitamin?

Okay, okay-- so it's a vitamin candy. But still. I think the big companies in the States should take a hint and start making sweets from things that can actually help our bodies.

Who's learning from who here?

One of the questions I receive the most from family, friends, and curious internet acquaintances (thanks for bonding me to the internet for life, Facebook) is how well my Korean is coming. The short answer is this: it's coming well. I am beginning to build confidence in my speaking skills, although admittedly I was shocked at how shy my usually-talkative mouth was to use Korean. Now that I'm putting myself out there, it's coming along alright. My main audience during an average day are:

1. taxi drivers.
2. random students on the street by my apartment.
3. the family of the noodle/kim bap house I love so much.
4. street vendors.

Every time I have a success with Korean locals, I walk away with a poker face of cool confidence, which bursts into the dorkiest grin imaginable as soon as I'm out of sight. Some of the highlights include:


1. the first time I directed a cabbie to my apartment.
2. the second time I directed a cabbie to my apartment (yeah, it was a pretty big deal).
3. the time I bartered with a shoe salesman for a sweet deal on some black boots in Busan.
4. the way the teachers and students at my school light up when I try to write their names in Hangul (imagine a poor foreigner sinking into her chair, scrawling on a piece of paper as several Koreans huddle around her yelling, "gim hae eun... eun! euuuuuuun!").
5. actually communicating with the 2-to-4-year-olds I cared for this weekend at children's house in Ulsan (this is going to be a different post entirely so keep an eye out).

So I'd place my language level at 3 years of age. That and taxi driver, which are about equivalent.

Much of this learning has been completed on my own time, but it hasn't been by myself. Aside from my co-teachers and foreign network, the biggest asset to my learning have been the kids I work with. They love taking time from their day to show me new words, test my knowledge of Hangul, or provide me with opportunities to listen to simple sentences being whined over and over... and over.

The best thing about learning from kids is that they never judge you for being wrong. They may laugh, but they never make you feel inferior for asking. They really have been some of my biggest supporters when it comes to learning, and certainly the biggest inspiration. So a big thank you to my students, and all the Korean children who lend a helping hand to tongue-tied foreigners like me.

On the other side of the spectrum is the image of an 'English speaker' I have to present to my students. As a foreign English teacher trying to learn Korean, it is sometimes difficult not to use a little here and there in the classroom just to make things run smoother. On a normal day at my school, this isn't much of an issue because the Korean teachers are already using their native language for much of the class. However, the reason English-speakers were hired to come here is to somehow be a tool for English immersion. I often laugh at this since I have about 1,000 students at my school and somehow must immerse them all in my language.

However, I do work an after-school program with limited numbers of students, so in those classes it is crucial that we have an 'English only' policy, for both me and the students. My classes are well-informed that if they speak Korean, they have to write lines. Although this is not my preferred method for a reward/punishment system, it is definitely effective in Korea. The only problem is that by the 5 o'clock hour (when after-school lessons begin), students do not want to keep to school rules, and they definitely don't want to be kept from speaking Korean.

So, what happens when you have an English teacher in a room of students who want to speak Korean?

 I think we're going to have a lesson on punctuation
sometime in the near future.

Yep. Punctuation.

This student's handwriting got suspiciously larger to cover more space.
Nice tactic.

I particularly like this kid's take on the punishment. Not only did he write 100 times in the smallest handwriting "I will speak English", but he wrote in blaring yellow marker... and still managed to save enough space to scrawl "THE END" at the bottom.

The age hierarchy in Korea would never allow me to say this aloud, but I think I learn just as much-- if not more-- from my students on a daily basis (and that's no knock to my teaching abilities!). Let's just chalk it up to say that what I learned in college still holds true: we all learn from one another.

Don't fret: North Korea's got shells but South Korea's got Seoul.

As many people have seen and heard through media drama, there is growing tension between North and South Korea this week; paramount to this situation was the shelling that occurred on Tuesday. Sadly, two South Korean soldiers died in this incident, and perhaps other North Korean casualties.

In my opinion, this is not going to be a proponent to battle. South and North Korea have been at war since the 1950's and, sadly, will likely continue to be at war for years to come. The media is creating an image of all-out war zones from an incident that, although horrible and destructive, did not have any major effect on our day-to-day routine.

I don't want to ignore the potential severity of this situation, nor do I wish to make light of the fact that there are families grieving for the loss of men who laid down their lives to protect this country, as well as thousands of displaced South Koreans who fled Yeonpyeon island and the two civillians killed. However, I'd like to discuss two points of view: that of the Koreans (not all the Koreans, of course; but those I talked to this week), and that of the foreigners. As you can imagine, our reactions-- although nervous at times-- are much more satirical.

When my co-teachers and I discussed the shelling today, there were mixed emotions. A couple of my co-teachers seemed legitimately concerned.

"You should go home to America!... Can I come with you? My family is only three."


"We don't need to sleep in your house! I have a tent."

Although these were said in jest (I think), it was strange to see my co-teachers show serious concern about this issue. So I nervously laughed and changed the subject.

I also took the opportunity to ask Mr. Woo, my 'Korean father' about this incident while her enjoyed his afternoon coffee with me. This led to a really enriching discussion about the relationship between the people in North and South Korea, and for the first time I got a closer insight into the way Korean people view the North. In essence, they are sad that their people are divided. The following is paraphrased from our discussion today:

"When I was younger, I visited North Korea one time... I had hopes we would become one country again and this expectation grew bigger and bigger. Over time this turned to disappointment. Now when I think about North Korea and our people my mind becomes sad and serious. Before I die I hope we are reunited. That is my hope and wish." 

Hearing Mr. Woo talk about this made me realize what a hole many Korean people must feel in their culture. It is like a family divided. The people of North Korea are not bad; many times in the US we mistake the citizens of North Korea for being the enemy, when it is the opposing government (and leadership) that is the cause of war and strife. In the US we also may not feel that same sense of unity because we are such an ethnically-diverse population. In Korea, there is so much history and unity through ethnicity. To have half of that missing... it weighs heavily on these people's minds at times.

According to Mr. Woo, there are plenty of South Koreans who do not share this view for economic reasons. Sharing government with North Korea would be a huge hit to their economic standing (which has progressed exponentially in just decades). So, as with many other important issues, it depends on who you ask.

The same goes for us waygooks. Today the internet was filled with fear, anxiety, frustration and humor from foreign teachers trying to make sense (or jokes) of the North Korea attack.

Here's one person who decided to make it clear to everyone just how far away they were from the shelling (thanks waygook Chris Morin):

Another entertainment I found was everyone's escape plans. A foreigner networking site procured a thread entitled, What to do if North Korea attacks. Here is one of my favorites:

"I've got my escape plan sorted... I don't think I can rely on my embassy either and heading into Seoul [as I think] that's the main place NK would bomb. So, I'd head straight down south and catch a ferry to Japan. I wouldn't think Seoul is a good place to run to especially if you live out of Seoul think about the traffic congestion the craziness at the time.
That's my plan, or you can choose to stay behind and stick it out and round up all of the Koreans with their weapons set up a plan of attack... Rambo, Arnie, Predator, Kungfu hustle, Terminator style.
I think I've watched too many action movies...but hey [it] could work."

 Yes; yes it could.

In all seriousness, US citizens do have a proper escape plan in the event of an evacuation, and friends and family-- I'm doing all I can to be aware and safe. Just consider it part of the adventure.

UPDATE: My walls are still intact (jokes people, jokes!), but every North Korean fire is being monitored closely. One of the main complaints from North Korea is that South Korea is practicing military drills 'too close' to their border. So, holding true to my theory that this issue is like a sibling fight, North Korea's military drill could be heard loud and clear from Seoul today, shaking up many South Korean citizens. A little passive aggressive, North Korea, but let's keep it more of the former than the latter, mkay?

Another interesting turn of events today was that the Minister of Defense in South Korea stepped down from his position, feeling that he had kept his country from being prepared in the event of an attack.

Lastly, kudos to the person whose escape plan was to go to Japan. I heard through the grapevine that US citizens would be evacuated there in the event of an emergency. Whether Rambo comes with us or not is another story.

How to make amazing Korean photobooth pictures.

This week, I finally got the experience I've been looking for in Korea: the magic of the cutesy, silly, completely fun photobooths! In fact, I loved the first time so much I went on 2 more occasions this week. It's safe to say I'm addicted... and also quickly becoming a pro. Here are some tips if you ever encounter one of these miraculous pieces of technology:

1. Check out the photobooth beforehand. If there's a cache of 'em (and if you're in Korea there usually is), it's okay to be picky! Look at the sample pictures to pick the one with the best effects.

2. Don't get too overwhelmed by the fact that you can't read anything on the touch screen. There are so many options for lighting, picture size, and whatnot that I'm sure it's even hard for Koreans to decide what to select. Just look at the pictures or, when in doubt, choose the button in your favorite color.

3. On the same note, be careful to keep track of all the countdowns. And I'm not just talking about when the camera goes off! There is usually a countdown for most selections you have to make. On most photobooths there is even a time limit for putting designs on your pictures, so just be aware! You wouldn't want to end up with half of a cat face drawn on your bestie.

4. Go all out. You are in Korea. If you're too camera shy to make silly faces, then liven up your pictures with tons of decals. Korean photobooths have a wonderfully fun selection of accessories, flowers, stars, and cartoon drawings of turds that will make your photos cute and even outright hilarious. The more the better!

5. Make the peace sign. You know you want to.

Now that you've been given this well of knowledge, go and spread the wealth by tracking down your very own Asian photobooth and taking a few pictures! And send them to me. I'd love to see what your face looks like with only one side of cat whiskers.